Feng Shui and Sadness

Photo by Mehdi on Unsplash

We’re moving into autumn now in the northern hemisphere, which is related to the element of metal. Autumn is also related to death and things dying away as well; think about how trees shed their leaves at this time of year. While I was hesitant to talk about this on the blog, I think it’s important to recognize that not everything is all about joy and happiness and making lots of money. There are really so many aspects to feng shui practice and philosophy, and also to dharma. I also study meditation and Buddhism, and feng shui and spirituality are very interconnected. 

Sadness is a part of life too, and it’s important to find a balance between yin and yang. This is something I’ve been working with personally. I think during this global pandemic we’ve all been hoping for things to stay the same or go back to how they were, and there’s an aspect of sadness to it. 

I’ve been reading a lot by Chögyam Trungpa recently, who is the teacher of my dharma teachers. One of the things he wrote is a really wonderful book called Shambhala: The Sacred Path of the Warrior. Something that’s been resonating with me a lot is connecting to tenderness and sadness, which I think a lot of people don’t like to talk about. In this book, Chögyam Trungpa asks us: “How much have you connected with yourself at all in your whole life?” I would add to that: “How much have you connected with your home, your family, and all of the people in your life?” Feng shui is really about beginning to look at those details in your environment and your home, and seeing how you and your home are connected. 

That’s also what the practice of meditation is about. It’s about connecting with yourself and spending time with yourself. When you do this, you may start to see that your home is empty, or that your heart is empty. With this feeling of autumn here in the Northern Hemisphere, there’s also a poignancy and a crispness in the air. We’re starting to say goodbye to summer and to the year, and there’s a feeling of endings. Just like we talk about people entering the autumn of their lives, there is also an autumn to every moment, every year, and every joy that we feel. There’s always a cycle of endings and beginnings, and we have to recognize that our lives go through transitions.

I could talk about how you could bring more joy into your home, but really I think the best way to start to do that is to include the experience of sadness and things falling away in your home as well. That might mean recognizing that it’s time to let go of a plant that isn’t doing well, trim some leaves that are no longer healthy, or change the summer bedding to the warmer bedding. We can begin to realize that things are always shifting around us, and what really leads to true joy is knowing that joy is connected to tenderness and sadness. We can see all these cycles happen in the environment around us, and then we can begin to work with them and have compassion for them in our daily lives, our spaces, and our interactions with other people. We begin to see that we’re interconnected and interdependent with our homes, our environments, the people in our lives, and all living beings. 

Instead of looking at feng shui as a way to always try to make things happier, I hope that you include these feelings of sadness that may come up as part of your feng shui experience. Know that happiness and sadness are two sides of the same coin, like yin and yang. I would encourage you to look at the details in your home as a metaphor for how things are going in your life, and to recognize and accept what is coming up. 

by Anjie Cho


If you’d like to learn more about feng shui, check out Mindful Design Feng Shui School at: www.mindfuldesignschool.com

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Q&A Sunday: Complete Your Unfinished Projects with Feng Shui

Photo by Sincerely Media on Unsplash

Photo by Sincerely Media on Unsplash

I realized I’ve started a ton of things and projects, but I don’t finish them so easily. Do you have any suggestions?

This is a very common challenge! It’s easy to get excited about new projects, and then lose interest. If this rings true for you, you might have a lot of wood element energy. Wood element people tend to start a lot of projects, and not finish them. (You can read more about the five elements here.) 

One way to work on finishing projects is to activate the completion area of the feng shui bagua. This area is called Dui in Chinese, and it’s related to children, the metal element, the color white, and completing things. To find Dui position, stand at your front door looking in, and imagine a three-by-three grid laid over your space. The middle right section is Dui, or the completion area. Here are a few ways to activate this gua:

  • Add a new, healthy plant. You could even look for one with white flowers or foliage since white is the color associated with Dui. 

  • Decorate this area of your home with white accents. You could paint a wall or piece of furniture white, or you can choose something small like a planter or throw pillow.

  • Ring a bell to activate the metal element.

  • Invite more metal element qualities into your life by wearing more white clothing.

Another way to make sure things get finished is to get help from other people. If you have a business and are having a hard time finishing work-related projects, consider hiring people who are really good at finishing things — maybe people who have a lot of metal element in them. If you want to finish household projects, could you hire someone to help you? Could you ask your partner or kids to lend a hand?  

by Anjie Cho


Thanks for reading our "Q&A Sunday". If you have personal questions, we encourage you to check out Practical Feng Shui or hire one of Anjie's Grads.


If you’d like to learn more about feng shui, check out Mindful Design Feng Shui School at: www.mindfuldesignschool.com

Q&A Sunday: Inviting Plants Into Your Home

What plants can I invite to my home to eliminate stagnation? My rooms seem to be so cluttered. No matter how much I clean and clean and clean, there is still so much stuff.

Lauren A. 

Hi Lauren, 

Thanks so much for your question! It looks like there are really two parts to the question here. First, what plants can you invite into your home to eliminate stagnation? The second part is about clutter and feeling a bit stuck. This is interesting, because they seem to be connected. You feel a bit stuck, which, in turn, is manifesting in your home as clutter, and you'd like to invite plants to eliminate this clutter. 

We do have some blog posts about different types of plants. You can check those out here. First, though, if your space is really cluttered, it might not be a great idea to add anything. Even bringing in plants is adding more things to your home, and caring for a plant is not easy! You have to take care of plants, prune them, there is upkeep and they need attention! So, you may actually add more clutter and stress to your life by including plants in your space. I do understand the sentiment, since, in general, plants invite growth and help eliminate the feeling of stagnation. In this situation however, this may not be the best move for you. 

You say you "clean and clean and clean"... it sounds like you may feel a bit overwhelmed! May I suggest a few different options? First, you can eliminate nine things each day. If this seems like too much, you can reduce it to nine items per week. This will help get the energy moving and help with your feelings of being stuck. If you do want to add something, you can add fresh flowers. Fresh flowers can lift and open things up, especially if you're feeling stuck and overwhelmed. I love the idea of fresh-cut flowers, because they represent nowness, are cheerful and have a short lifespan. They uplift your space, but the upkeep is minimal, since you'll just need to change the water. And when they expire, you can let them go.

Another way to break up this stagnation is to ask for help. It's great that you've asked me for help, but is there someone in your space that can help out as well? Are there others in the home that can help you clean? You could even hire a cleaning person to help reduce the overwhelm. If you're having trouble thinking of someone to ask for help, try activating the Benefactors area of your home or bedroom. This might actually be a good place for the fresh flowers!

Finally, you can also cut through some of the clutter and stagnation using sounds, like a gong or tingsha. You can even sing! Go around your home, starting at the front door and moving clockwise, and circumambulate the space. I really recommend the metal bells, since that will welcome Metal energy to cut through the sluggishness and get things moving. I suggest using this in combination with activating the Benefactors area and adding fresh flowers. Let us know how it goes!

by Anjie Cho


Thanks for reading our "Q&A Sunday".  We will be answering questions submitted by our readers. Click here to submit any Feng Shui or Green Design questions!